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RBC: History In The Making! Or Just What I Keep Telling Myself (I)

Sometimes I am glad that I do not have a huge readership. Mostly friends, and friends of friends; and on those rare occasions, friends of friends of friends…Uh, okay, perhaps it is not that small. Okay, anyway, so as far as blogging things of interest, I wanted to announce that as of last week, I have been part of the RBC Peon Club (RPC) for exactly seven years. Forget the exact date, perhaps the 13th, but ultimately it is amazing how times zooms, flies, explodes in your face like that.

Yes, who would have known that one morning’s self-inquiry, probably based on too much coffee about the possibility of working in IT would tsunami upon 7 years of my life? That’s the way the cookie crumbles I guess.

As such I am looking for other alternatives, not because I hate my job. I actually enjoy being a wing nut in RBC’s IT geek machine. However, my health has not been the best for a while and the thought has cross me that perhaps a change would prove beneficial. Do something more creative, more laissez-faire, more freedom: So most likely a pay cut.

Of course I have no one to point a finger at except myself. ‘Your career is always in your hands,’ says any XYZ Corporation. So it is of no shock RBC would say the same. Sure they hired me in a field I did not go to school for; sure they threw a bunch of money at me and promoted me to the same management level as a branch manager within a year. But I think it is time that I start thinking about myself. Not just because it is in my best interest but in theirs are well. Wow, I AM a swell guy. Call me Mr. Altruistic.

And I think everyone owes it to themselves to be as altruistic as me. It seems that I keep on meeting people who are sticking around their jobs not because they enjoy it (cheers to those of you who do) but because of their pay (read: it’s safe), stock options or benefits. I mean, why? Is that the price of doing things we rather not be doing?

Or is it something more? Like: FEAR? It is no secret most people are afraid of the unknown and throwing themselves in the wind in the hopes of facing in the right direction can be nerve wracking. But what better way to incite change than impending doom?

Some would say ‘Hey, take that bitch up and use it.’ Okay maybe not in those exact words, however the point is there for anyone to take, make it your own and run with it to the nearest paid-by-the-hour motel.

As such, I am currently working in making sure that I do not hit an eight-year anniversary, not because I want to leave the bank, oh no, but because I am just an altruistic type of guy.

NewsBrief Part VIII: Waiting Three Days And Counting For Date: “She’s Coming, I Know It”

Naperville – Phillips R. Sacks, a veteran greeter at the local Wal-Mart would like to let Mary Reighton know he is still waiting at Kit-Kat Tsunami, a trendy downtown pool lounge and tobacco shop to begin their first date.

‘Sure, she didn’t seem interested at first, but things change. I remember there was a time last week when she wouldn’t even talk to me. Persistence pays off.’

The date began last Friday night when he arrived at Kit-Kat at around 8:00pm. Mr. Sacks spent the first three hours playing pool, then had a few beers and since then has sustained himself on a mixture of free peanuts, water and lots speciality coffee. ‘Women are always late so I don’t think much of it.’

Andrew Beers added his establishment being open 24/7 is what has kept him from removing Mr. Sacks from the premises. We normally have a $5 per person seating policy and he has been spending $5.25 every hour he’s been here. I want the good folk of Naperville to know Kit-Kat stands by its policies. Even if he starting to reek. So if you want to have a good time Kit-Kat is the place to be. Remember we do parties, weddings and catered events; look us up in the yellow pages. Our prices ar—’ When reminded the article was about Mr. Sacks endeavour, he added ‘Yeah, what a chump. He hasn’t moved off that sofa and the wait staff are beginning to complain. If he stays for another day, the stench is going to get pretty bad. The moment he runs dry, he is out of here.’

Mr. Sacks met Miss Reighton at his job where she was a customer. ‘It was attraction at first sight. Mind you she gave me quite the chase. I almost lost her twice, around the toy aisle and when she hid in the women’s change room. She was sneaky, she thought I would not dare but that is how you impress a girl.’

Mrs. Reighton was contacted but we were unable to reach her for comment.

NewsBrief Part VI: Bush’s Low Approval Ratings Part Of Evil Mexican Plot

Miami- Fox News released a report yesterday revealing the President’s all-time low approval ratings to be the result of evil Mexicans. The report added these Mexicans are working illegally and unified to the common goal of making Mr. Bush appear as a desperate politician willing to pull any half-cooked stunt to inflate sagging ratings.

The report is yet another drop in the bucket in the never before seen flurry to stop the flow of illegal immigrants. “It’s about time!” said Fox News political correspondent Beige Bush, calling illegal Mexicans ‘lazy’ and ‘more preoccupied with tacos and siestas except when it comes to ruining my second-cousin’s good name.’
When asked to comment on the possibility the current immigration initiative to be a plot to distract the American people from the aftermath of the Iraq war Mrs. Bush added ‘What Iraq war? Are there illegal Mexicans over there?’

The issue has already reached a feverous pitch when the President made a televised address two days ago in which he informed the nation that 6,000 National Guard Reserves would be mobilized to the border to stop evil immigrants. ‘Sure they can run but we have snipers who specialize on moving targets.’

When asked why suddenly the issue of illegal immigrants has become the current administration’s de facto issue, he said ‘Mexicans have always been on my mind. Don’t get me wrong. I have always respected our neighbours to the south. Back in Texas they made 3/4 of my staff. As you may already know, America will always need maids, cleaning staff and gardeners.’

The topic was then changed to the phone-tapping inquest, Mr. Bush said ‘The fact that we’re discussing this programme is helping the enemy.’ Defending his actions ‘as necessary’ he continued to add that as far as he was aware no laws had been broken. ‘But it would not surprise me if it was an illegal alien who tipped the press.’

–‘NewsBriefs’ appear monthly in the Toike Okie, U of T’s premier satirical newspaper since 1908 —

Letter To My MPP: SmartMeters? What The $^&*$@%!# Are You Thinking?

This was a letter sent to Mr. Smitherman, my MPP regarding Toronto’s new Smart-meters that if without opposition could start infiltrating Toronto homes as early as this summer. Although a good idea in concept, the way they are going at it is as boneheaded as only politicians have the gift to make it.

This is Mr. McGuinty’s plan to have Torontonians save electricity by doing their laundry at ‘off peak’ hours. Like, let’s say 3:00am in the morning.
If you rent than this affects you! Write your MPP, make them earn their lunch money.


Good day Mr. Smitherman,

I am taking this opportunity –my first in fact – to write to you about an issue, which has gravely alerted my attention. Mr. McGuinty’s proposed use of ‘smart meters’ in the city of Toronto, although a good plan at heart, needs to be rethought before it can ever come upon real-world implementation.

Mr. Smitherman, this plan does not take into consideration a landlord’s responsibility to upgrade a tenant’s unit or appliances to the latest most energy efficient models. I would also wager that most would be unable to financially fulfil this task. Further still, once they are no longer footing the hydro bill, it is easy to see their desire to replace them waver even more. Especially if McGuinty allows landlords to mandate their own generic discount on a tenant’s rent. After all, a building does not have to be environmentally friendly or efficient to pass code.

Under these circumstances, if a landlord cannot\refuses to upgrade appliances, don’t you think passing the expense of hydro over to tenants is not only unfair but an obvious lack of environmental concern by Mr. McGuinty and Queen’s Park? It sounds more like a misguided attempt to save a quick buck rather than avoiding an ‘energy crisis.’

So what if this plan comes into fruition? I can only imagine the logistical nightmare of keeping track of the new hardware and the billing system that will surely come with it. Instead of having one bill, now you are going to deliver over 320 to my building alone? How many trees are going to be cut down every billing cycle in order to keep Toronto’s mostly circa ‘80s appliances running? How about the new staff that will need to be hired?

To quote Mr. McGuinty from his April 19nth, 2004 Legislative assembly speech, it is easy for him or anyone to say “That old, inefficient beer fridge in the basement may seem like your best friend at playoff time — but every time you open the door it’s “pay-up time,” because that fridge can be costing you about $150 a year in extra electricity — electricity we can’t afford to waste.” Well, what about when that ‘inefficient fridge’ takes the form of your inefficient heater, or your stove, or your kitchen fridge? These things happen and they are not being addressed, could someone explain why tenants should pay for something they have no control over?

On a different note Mr. Smitherman, why no one ever touches on the fact that we do not need the CIBC tower on the Northwest corner of Yonge and Bloor lit up like a Christmas tree every night? Or what about the Manulife Centre? Or the Eaton Center Tower? Or most of the downtown core for that matter? How many lights does an evening cleaning crew need? Ultimately the key of this enterprise is not to save a buck but to save power, and hopefully save a buck or two meanwhile we are at it. I doubt that my own apartment building at 40 Gerrard Street East could ever compete with the power usage of the Royal Bank plaza at Bay and Front streets, as they have the advantage of their thousands of computers but only a soul or two per floor after 9:00pm.

If we are trying to save electricity why not legislate for landlords, particularly of large buildings and the private sector to implement solar power panels on their roofs for example? Generally, most roofs have gravel and a few pipes, they have the space and it will benefit them in the long term.

What about lower income families? Those very families who happen to live in less than perfect conditions; do you think Mr. Smitherman their landlord would have the funds to fix their drafty windows, bad heating and replace their energy wasting appliances? When that does not happen, whom do you think will be left in the cold when they are not able to afford to live even in those less than perfect conditions?

I am not saying that smart-meters are bad idea Mr. Smitherman, but the way Mr. McGuinty it is going about it definitely proves his $100,000+ a year salary has segregated him and is now out of touch from the average Toronto citizen and father still from someone who is an actual tenant. Where is ‘our’ voice being represented in all of this?

I am expecting a response to see what will be done about this matter. Oh, and if I may, could you be kind enough to email me a response. No fancy paper on regular mail, please.

Thank you for your time,

You can find some other thoughts on the matter if you click to this quick exchange on this forum.